While there are lots of meltable non-dairy cheeses on the market, when it comes to pizza 9 times out of 10, I prefer mine cheeseless. When it’s just crust and sauce, the toppings pop in the mouth. I can pick up the flavors of pineapple, onions, olives, sauerkraut, jalapenos, or whatever vegetables are dressing my pizza pie; there’s nothing to mask their flavors. This is something of an anomaly to people who think that cheese is to pizza what It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown is to Halloween, what traffic is to the 405, and what nutritional yeast is to popcorn – a basic necessity.
So over the years of ordering, eating, and offering cheeseless pizza I’ve noticed there are some consistent truths. First, no one ever wants to order cheeseless pizza, and two, no matter how much your order, there is never enough. I’ve noticed a few other things about cheeseless pizza, which have been documented in the above short and funny newsreel called The Three Stages of Cheeseless Pizza. You’ve heard of the five stages of grief? Well, this is like that, but with marinara. Have a slice, and I’ll be back soon with more of The Vegan Test!